Ninjas vs. Vampires is one of the most painful films I have ever had to endure. I completely missed the comedy element; I know this film was meant to be 'so bad it’s good' but trust me, it was far, far worse than that.
As for the costumes; imagine the whole cast, blind-folded, falling into the amateur dramatics society props department during sci-fi week, and climbing out fully dressed, and you’re about there.
The weak plot basically involves love-struck Aaron (Jay Saunders) seeking out and joining the ninjas to wage a nightly war against the forces of darkness. He essentially has to save the world and win the girl. Ninja vs. Vampires has oodles of fight scenes, which I have to say, are very well orchestrated and are definitely the most impressive element of the film. This was one of those films; and let’s be honest, we’ve all seen ‘em. Those films when the end credits roll, you look at one another and burst out laughing because you cannot believe that you’ve just wasted 90 minutes of your life on such diabolical tripe.
The low budget doesn’t help but it isn’t entirely to blame. I simply didn’t find Ninjas vs. Vampires funny – or scary – or entertaining. It was like wading through treacle; bloody hard work. I could bang on for hours about the bad points but that would be pointless. So I’ll tell you the good points; the fight scenes are excellent and Jay Saunders can act a bit.
If this film ever comes up and you feel some strange urge to watch, please I implore you, fight it. Then I can say that I did not endure Ninjas vs. Vampires, from title sequence to end credits, in vain. If I have saved just one of you from the boredom and discomfort of this film, my work here is done.
That being said, as always my review is simply my opinion, and if you really wanna risk it ... well, don’t say I didn’t warn you.
NINJAS VS. VAMPIRES (2010) WRITER/DIRECTOR: Justin Timpane. Cast: Jay Saunders, Daniel Ross, Cory Okouchi, Devon Marie Burt, Carla Okouchi, Kurt Skarstedt.
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